Socialisation

I've come to learn that there's a lot of bad information out there.

Most sources push as much socialisation/exposure as possible. One of my earlier trainers gave me a list of places and experiences to tick off.

Which is all fine in theory but there was never any mention about taking it at your dog’s pace. It was a lot of pressure to do all this in the next few weeks or your dog will be ruined for life.

It's a hell of a lot of pressure to do the 'right' thing.

Obviously socialisation is important. But I wish there was more information on also taking it at your dog’s pace, and not forcing them into multiple situations which they are really struggling with.

Flooding refers to overwhelming a dog by constantly exposing them to a scary thing. It's not good, despite what some trainers claim.

It's a fine line to tread.

As a new puppy owner, you want to do everything right. You are still getting to know your puppy and are still learning to read their body language.

It was apparent that George was a timid puppy outside of the house.

At one of our earlier puppy classes, George kept jumping back in his travel carrier - his safe space. The trainer said that is absolutely fine. Just being around the dogs and people is still socialisation. That was very helpful for me and stopped me making worse mistakes.

Before George was fully vaccinated, I would walk him around the neighbourhood in a sling. He was exposed to traffic noises, people etc. He did burrow down into the sling on the first few walks, another sign he was a timid soul.

I tried to take it gently and slowly. He got a range of safe experiences but I did make mistakes along the way.

When he was reluctant to walk around the neighbourhood, I would cajole him along. I didn't force him, and our walks were often only a couple of minutes, but I have since learned that you need to go as slow as it takes. No cajoling.

With gentle socialisation and confidence-building activities, we were making good progress. George was reliably off-leash in busy areas, had excellent recall and showed no signs of anxiety.

But I was making a major mistake.

I thought it was OK (in fact, I thought it was necessary) for him to meet strange dogs while we were out and about.

I would speak to the owner and check it was OK which I thought was enough. I would not make that mistake again. Any future dogs I have will only socialise with dogs that we know.

George experienced two very stressful incidents - he was chased by a large dog, and attacked by another dog.

At the time, I didn't think of it as an attack as he had no injuries. But that's what it was. A dog went for him, snarling and biting, and knocked him over.

It was such a weird situation as they had both greeted each other 'normally', off-leash, with both owners nearby. Although I expect I would interpret the situation differently now that I have learned more about dog body language.

All of our careful confidence-building went out of the window and we were dealing with severe anxiety and reactivity.

He didn't need to meet those dogs. He had plenty of social time and he was doing well.

I still give myself a hard time over this. I am devastated that it happened.

On one of our early group walks, as George bounded over excitedly to meet two dogs, the owner said very politely and clearly "I don't allow my dogs to meet on leash."

We stopped of course and I reflected on it later. Much later. When I understood more about behaviour and leash reactivity.

I was so impressed. She advocated so clearly and calmly for her dogs. I love that she didn't say sorry (I tend to over apologise).

So whilst I think I got some things right with socialisation, I would definitely do things differently.

If my dog shows signs of anxiety, I would slow it right down.

And I would be so careful about my dog socialising with other dogs.